The Blessings that we take for granted in life

There comes a time in all of our lives where we realize just how lucky we are.  We realize how blessed our lives our.  I have several friends who blog but read one while catching up this morning.  I cried like a blubbering idiot. I cried tears of joy for her but also tears of joy for my own life.

First off though, let's talk about blessings, about life.  Often times we get annoyed by things, we take for granted things that others would leap for joy at.  I have a friend who can never enjoy thunderstorms.  Thunderstorms trigger her headaches.  When fronts move in she has to have very painful shots.  These shots lead to her being in bed for several days.  She doesn't get to stand out and enjoy thunderstorms.  The sad part is that I hate thunderstorms.  They scare me.  I have been through some natural disasters in my life (2tornado and 2 hurricanes) and I just feel a total loss of control.

I have another friend who when sick, cannot just go buy over the counter meds to fix a cold or whatever.  Because of his heart issues, something as simple as a menthol cough drop could be a bad thing.

But back to my friend's blog that made me cry this morning.  I have two friends who have non verbal children because of their autism.  Having a bouncy incredible boy that talks incessantly.  His latest is to crawl up in our lap and say "Let's talk about snow."  He then goes into this whole vision he has about what we would do in snow and what stuff like sleds and skis we would take with us.  It is really funny.

These are things I take for granted.  I take for granted these thought provoking conversations that don't make sense sometimes.  They don't usually have life changing moments.  Cade has an incredibly vivid imagination and currently in his play room with one of his toys travelling down a huge hill really fast.  He is goofy.

So, my friend blogged this morning about an incredible Christmas gift.  On Christmas morning, her 8 yr old called her "mom."  I have no words.  I have no understanding how amazing that must have been except that even re-typing it right now brings me back to tears.  Cade calls me mom everyday.  It was his first word. . It is still the sweetest thing in the world when he says, "I love you mommy."  For awhile I had that as my text message alert and people thought I was crazy.

In life we are all very blessed.  We take most of those blessings for granted.  We don't understand how wonderful our lives are sometimes.  Then at brief moments, we are shot back in to those realities of the remarkable blessings that are so precious.

Thank you, God.
AMEN

Procrastination gone bad -- but will turn out good

It's cold in San Antonio.  (Yeah, big news I know).  So as I was sitting and watching the news last night, I had a "duh" moment.  They were showing homeless downtown struggling for warmth.

I got a pit in my stomach.  You see, unbeknown  to most people at CTK, there is a box of blankets that was supposed to go somewhere 4 years ago.  I, at this point, have know idea where.  It was someone's project that fell through and we "forgot" they were there in a storage closet.  It is a major fail that just sometimes happens unfortunately.

So what do you do at 6:00 at night, when you have  probably 30 or so blankets that are not huge but it is really cold in San Antonio?  Practically and realistically, at that hour not a whole lot of anything.  The shelters had met curfew so going there really would not have helped.   It turns out Salvation Army doesn't want blankets.  Okay?

So, I did some research.  Went to places I knew and made calls.  From many I got -- bring them to a donation center.  The problem there is that the blankets are needed NOW - not after processing.

Here in a bit, I will be taking them down to St. Vincent De Paul to their dining room.  People who need them will be able to pick them up as needed.

What do I take from all of this?  Wow, procrastination and  not following through is really detrimental to programming.  Why has it taken this long for anybody to do anything with these blankets?  How sad is it that at the time, we were going to do something GOOD, but no one ever followed through.

This is how much of life is though.  Throughout the holidays, I passed the little red Salvation Army buckets by because I was too lazy to walk the 20 steps back to my car to grab change.  I would always say, "oh, next time I will grab the change."  How many times do I leave my food pantry donation at home instead of bringing it to church on Sunday?

This month starts our church's focus on Souper Bowl of Caring.  This is a tradition we have started from the national www.souperbowl.org campaign.  Everyone will be bringing food to church (gentle reminder) and will be donating money for 30 Hour Famine.

Let us each though additionally take that time to not procrastinate about helping.  Putting off helping does no good.  The "oh, I will do it tomorrow" mentality really helps no one.

So now, off to St. Vincent De Paul.

Are you living life to the fullest?

This past week or so I have been blah.  It has not been an explainable blah, but blah nonetheless.  I guess there is a whole lot going on in my head and sorting it all out has been challenging.  


In speaking with a friend, I began to see that maybe this was God trying to tell me something.  Maybe these walls that i felt I was running into might be God's way of having me relook at things.  


So then, I workout this morning.  (It still amazes me sometimes how God works and puts all these pieces into my head so that things make sense.)  I programmed many songs into my mp3 player this morning so i put it on shuffle just to get a variety.  2 songs that came on went right along with everything in my head.  

Gloria - Watermark
I wish I could crash like the waves and turn like the autumn breeze - In effort to praise You
I wish I could smell like the forest, the fragrance lifting a mighty chorus - In effort to praise You
In effort to praise
But I'm such a limited creature - And my words can only paint so many pictures
But somewhere I think I read that I am treasured over all creation - So I know that I must try
I wish I could roll like the thunder, to leave the earth below in wonder - In effort to praise You
I wish I could fall like the summer rain and every drop would sing Your name - In effort to praise You
But I'm such a limited creature - And my words can only paint so many pictures
But somewhere I'm sure I read that I am treasured over all creation - So I know that I must try
Gloria, glory in the highest - Forever I will hide myself in Thee
Oh, gloria - Glory in the highest - Forever I will hide myself in Thee
Every breath that I breathe, every moment in my history - Is an effort to praise You
Glory in the highest - Forever I will hide myself in Thee
Oh, Gloria - Glory in excelsis Deo


So this song got me thinking.  I am a perfectionist in many ways.  In many ways, my ego really likes to take over and really likes to be in control.  What I find happens then, a lot of times, is that in an effort to live the life that I am supposed to be living -- I get stuck.  I don't want to fail.  I don't want to upset anyone.  I don't want that uncertainty that comes next.  I want control.  

Now with all this swimming around in my head, I really was pushing the eliptical trainer that much faster. This is when the next song came on.

All Creatures of our God and King (redone by David Crowder)
All creatures of our God and King - Lift up your voice and with us sing
Oh, praise Him Alleluia
Thou burning sun with golden beam - Thou silver moon with softer gleam
Oh, praise Him - Oh, praise Him
Alleluia Alleluia Alleluia



So what does it all mean?  
Many times in life we find ourselves searching.  We, perhaps, know what the next step of the day, the moment, the life is.  We know what we need to be doing.  For some reason though, we don't.  Perhaps it is fear, perhaps uncertainty.  But when we pause to look at the rest of creation doing what they need to be doing, being what that need to be being -- what do we find?  


Does a dog say, "Oh no, I might not dig this hole quite right -- so I guess I won't dig at all?"
Does a tree not go through the growing process because it is scared to get a little taller?


We are no different than the dog and the tree.  We have to take that next step of uncertainty.  We have to believe that because of God's unending love for us, that we can and will be all that we are supposed to be.  It ain't easy.  Life never is.  But it is so worth it to make those goals, to step away from the comfort zones and do whatever it is that God has put us on the earth to do - Praise and Glorify HIM.  


AMEN

I am a life-r. Yep, that's me

So this Sunday is the Sunday that honors the Baptism of Jesus.  It was this Sunday, 10 years ago that I officially started work as a youth director.  That sounds so weird to say.

I remember sitting at my first youth director conference thing and they would go around and ask how long people had been in youth ministry.  I was down at the bottom of the numbers, 2 months.  I remember thinking people must be crazy to stay in youth ministry 10 years.  That was an unattainable goal in my mind.  That was a very long time.

Now I sit in that category.  That is weird.  That is cool.  That is still somewhat awkward to comprehend.

When I was in the 2nd grade, I wanted to be an orthodontist.  I knew I wanted to go to Baylor.  I knew what courses I would need to take to attain my goal of being an orthodontist.  There was no doubt in my mind.

When I was in 5th grade I had a mind blowing camping ministry experience that charted me on a different course.  It was a course that I did not accept or understand til college, but God kept tapping me on the shoulder.  I didn't listen though because I wanted to be an orthodontist.

When I started college, I was going to be an orthodontist.  That was it.  Quickly, I started to feel that little "God tap" on my shoulder reminding me that there was a different calling.  I just kept saying, "God, you do not know what you are talking about.  I am going to be an orthodontist and THAT IS THAT.  There is no changing my mind."

I laugh at those little God talks now.  I laugh at all the times I REALIZED what I was supposed to be doing and laughed it off.  I had my goals set and I am pretty headstrong.  The second semester of my freshman year, I was no longer going to be an orthodontist.  I was majoring in Theology and never looked back.

I still didn't know the "WHAT" in theology that I wanted to do.  That took me quite awhile.  I realized youth ministry was my calling when I was sitting on my front porch, crying and wailing and yelling at God because my dog died.  It was my emotional meltdown sitting on my porch in Kingsbury Texas that somehow sent me to this AWESOME road that I have now been on and am proud to have walked.

I feel called to work with youth and families in my church now more than ever.  I love to teach them about prayer and devotion.  I love to laugh and cry with them when drama happens.  I love everything that goes with this ministry -- the good, bad and sometimes ugly.

I giggle at the thought that I was so headstrong about being an orthodontist.  I giggle that for so long, God was yelling at me -- not just calling -- but yelling.  I didn't want to listen, I knew what I was supposed to do.  BOY WAS I WRONG!!!

AMEN

It's a new year. Yeah, so?

I have never really understood the complexity of what some people see as the all important "New Year's Resolution."  They have never made a lot of sense.  Really, now that I think about it, other than me writing a new year on my checkbook, I don't know that New Year's has that big of an impact on my life.

So, this troubles me a bit.  I have to be honest.  There are thousands of people who are right now working out for the first time in their lives in hopes of losing weight in 2010.  I noticed the parking lot of the gym where I belong was full this morning.  Normally, when I work out at 6:00 in the morning, there are maybe 5 others in there as well.  This morning that number quadrupled.  But why?  Why does New Year's signify the day where we have to start over?  And if there is a significance, do people actually understand why they make these resolutions?  Or do people just make them because "we have always done it that way before?"

So... it seems there is in fact history -- (knew there was)
http://ezinearticles.com/?The-History-of-New-Years-Resolutions&id=245213

The tradition of the New Year's Resolutions goes all the way back to 153 B.C. Janus, a mythical king of early Rome was placed at the head of the calendar.

With two faces, Janus could look back on past events and forward to the future. Janus became the ancient symbol for resolutions and many Romans looked for forgiveness from their enemies and also exchanged gifts before the beginning of each year.

The New Year has not always begun on January 1, and it doesn't begin on that date everywhere today. It begins on that date only for cultures that use a 365-day solar calendar. January 1 became the beginning of the New Year in 46 B.C., when Julius Caesar developed a calendar that would more accurately reflect the seasons than previous calendars had.

The Romans named the first month of the year after Janus, the god of beginnings and the guardian of doors and entrances. He was always depicted with two faces, one on the front of his head and one on the back. Thus he could look backward and forward at the same time. At midnight on December 31, the Romans imagined Janus looking back at the old year and forward to the new.

The Romans began a tradition of exchanging gifts on New Year's Eve by giving one another branches from sacred trees for good fortune. Later, nuts or coins imprinted with the god Janus became more common New Year's gifts.

In the Middle Ages, Christians changed New Year's Day to December 25, the birth of Jesus. Then they changed it to March 25, a holiday called the Annunciation. In the sixteenth century, Pope Gregory XIII revised the Julian calendar, and the celebration of the New Year was returned to January 1.

The Julian and Gregorian calendars are solar calendars. Some cultures have lunar calendars, however. A year in a lunar calendar is less than 365 days because the months are based on the phases of the moon. The Chinese use a lunar calendar. Their new year begins at the time of the first full moon (over the Far East) after the sun enters Aquarius- sometime between January 19 and February 21.

Although the date for New Year's Day is not the same in every culture, it is always a time for celebration and for customs to ensure good luck in the coming year.

Ancient New Years

The celebration of the New Year is the oldest of all holidays. It was first observed in ancient Babylon about 4000 years ago. In the years around 2000 BC, Babylonians celebrated the beginning of a new year on what is now March 23, although they themselves had no written calendar.

Late March actually is a logical choice for the beginning of a new year. It is the time of year that spring begins and new crops are planted. January 1, on the other hand, has no astronomical nor agricultural significance. It is purely arbitrary.

The Babylonian New Year celebration lasted for eleven days. Each day had its own particular mode of celebration, but it is safe to say that modern New Year's Eve festivities pale in comparison.

The Romans continued to observe the New Year on March 25, but their calendar was continually tampered with by various emperors so that the calendar soon became out of synchronization with the sun.

In order to set the calendar right, the Roman senate, in 153 BC, declared January 1 to be the beginning of the New Year. But tampering continued until Julius Caesar, in 46 BC, established what has come to be known as the Julian Calendar. It again established January 1 as the New Year. But in order to synchronize the calendar with the sun, Caesar had to let the previous year drag on for 445 days.

It all makes sense really.  Out with the old and in with the new seems logical but then, don't we do that everyday really?  Martin Luther talked about remembering his Baptism each morning when he washed his face.  Baptism is yet another "out with the old and in with the new."  Why then do we not celebrate the anniversary of our Baptism as our "New Year?"  When one goes from being single to married that is a BIG "out with the old and in with the new" time.  Of course I did that on January 2, 1999 so New Year's was pretty close there.

I guess it all comes down to the important things in your life.  For many in 12 step programs, the day they became sober, or the day they stopped whatever addiction they had becomes a MAJOR new years experience.  Those times when they totally changed their life for the better.

I don't know that I have had a mindblowing, life changing New Year experience that I can really look back on and say "WOW my life just changed.  I don't ever want to go back."  Sure, I have had small ones throughout my life -- those milestones that I always look back on with great fondness.  And, I guess that is ok.  New Year's will always be just another day for me.  It is a day that means I have to write a new date on the checkbook.  It is a day that means I have to do an Annual Report at church.  That really is all it is though.  The little milestones in my life mean so much more.  The times in my life where I can look back and smile and say, "Wow, I think my life just changed and I don't want to go back."

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!


AMEN

Where do you pray? How do you pray?

I have thought alot about comforting places in our lives as well as those places we don't want to go back to.

But today I want to think more about praying places and praying spaces.

It is always amazing to me that most people I know and talk to will say that they don't know how to pray.  Prayer is so simply a conversation with God and a connection with God.  There are so many different kinds and ways to pray.

Jesus teaches his disciples in the Gospel to pray using the Lord's Prayer.  Children learn to pray before meals and bedtime.  Cade everyday says the prayer he learned at the CTK Child Development Center last year.  "Hands up high.  Hands down low.  Hands out wide and then close.  God we thank you for this food, for rest and home and all things good; for wind and rain and sun above, but most of all for those we love.  AMEN Thank you God and Jesus.

It is a simple prayer.  It was funny when he learned it, he was almost like Pavlov's dog.  He prayed it 4 times on the way from church to home one Sunday signalling us that he was ready to eat NOW.

When we lost Muffin last month to illness, we talked to Cade about Jesus taking care of Muffin.  Cade prayed for Muffin and that Jesus would keep her safe.  Its fun to watch Cade's understanding of prayer and teach me where I might need to head in prayer.

Then there is this prayer journey I have been on for awhile.  Each day I have made a conscious effort to spend time with God.  I have talked about how freeing and stress releasing it has been to make this practice.

But what about the WHERE question?  In this day and time of busy places and busy lives, where do you feel comfortable praying?  At different times and in different situations, there are many places where I want to pray.  Here lately, a nice hot bath with candles has been a great place to spend time with God.  The other day, when at the gym, I had some wonderfully uplifting music playing and had one of the most meaningful prayer times in several weeks while running on the eliptical trainer.  The quiet in myself and music playing in my ears made for great conversation time with God.

The thing is, prayer time can happen anywhere really.  Sitting in class waiting for everyone to finish the test; a traffic jam on 1604; a commercial between your favorite show.  There is no wrong time to pray.  There is no wrong way to pray.  But, we cannot live without that time of connection and reconnection with God.

And then there comes the next part -- "But I don't know what to say."  I hear that so many times from youth.  We have prayer time at the end of Sunday School that usually leads to me doing all the talking and a lot of awkward giggles.  We think we will do it wrong.  How do you pray wrong?  We have this understanding that our words won't be good enough for God?  That cannot be farther from the truth.

For the longest time I did not understand that.  For the longest time, I didn't think my words were good enough.  I remember one time at camp (yeah lots of my memories are camp memories), I did not get to sleep til well after 2 am because I just kept talking to God.  There laying in my bed, all I wanted to do was have a talk with God.  I didn't know if I was doing it right (I was only in the 8th grade) but I knew I was doing it right too.

So -- where do you pray?  how do you pray? what makes you want to have that talk with God?

Connect and Reflect

There comes a point in your life when you have to stop and look at everything.  Today is my anniversary.  My husband and I said, "I do" at TLU in Seguin.  We have had a great marriage.  We now have a beautiful 4 1/2 year old that in a great asset to both of our lives.  We have had the ups, downs and ins and outs.  At the end of the day, Jody supports and loves me more than anything I could ask for.  Even when he is busy and has tons of obligations, he still sends me a text or calls me to say, "I love you."

You see, that is all I need.  We share a wonderful life together.  We aren't perfect but we grow and learn and that is all that matters.

Looking back at when we first met, the internet.  Yes, we met online.  The only communication we had with each other for the first 9 months or so was pretty much online and phone.

Connection is a funny thing.  I just started a book that talks about connections and the church as they relate to social networking.  Essentially that is what Jody and I had way back when -- primitive social networking.  Many of my youth and I communicate daily by Facebook and texting.  It is a reasonable way that we can keep in touch and stay connected.  It is nice because it allows me to let them know I am praying for them and it gives them a steady connection with me.

It will be interesting to see where this book takes me.  It is called "The Church of Facebook" by Jesse Rice.  As I have only just started, I am really looking forward to seeing what it says about yet another connection.

Happy Anniversary Jody.